Hi

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I'm kinda lost right now. I've been very busy. I'm trying to come back to my muses without having to rely on being upset. It's not working. There have been some pretty devastating blows as of late. I've lost someone recently. You probably saw it on the news. I'm not going to name her. She wasn't a victim of the shooting. Just a beautiful butterfly spirited girl that got taken by nature. I miss her dearly. She was a sister and part of the family. I don't want to talk about it.

I don't know why I'm updating this. Sometimes I just feel like I need someone to talk to ya know?

I dropped out of college. This is my year off. I have about four jobs and not very many friends. No one to really talk to friend wise. Though my dad says I can talk to him any time... but yeah no.

So like I said. Just kinda lost right now. I have two things I can upload tonight. Don't know when the next one's coming. Whenever I get a chance to write something that doesn't suck I guess.

Sorry to be the Christmas downer. I'll try to be more positive in the new year. Two am always finds me buried in my musings and typically pretty sad. Maybe I should go to sleep. There's a novel idea.

I'm out

Rachel

Oh. And Happy Holidays
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